My Summertime Pity Party

Some people are super excited for school to get out and for Summer vacation to start.

You know, normal people like kids, teachers, parents, ice cream men.

I, on the other hand, always have mixed feelings about the whole thing.

While we always take a long trip back home and seeing my family is one of the best parts of the year, Summer is also very stressful and tiring.

My oldest has some special needs, one of them being a reliance on structure and routine.

School gives him that.

While I do get the relief of not having my stomach lurch every time the phone rings, when school’s out it’s up to me to provide that structure, all….day…..long.

It’s still a work in progress and I admit I don’t like being the bad guy.

I’m the mom that won’t let her kids sleep in because everyone gets out of sync.

I’m the mom that makes the kids come in from playing outside to get ready for bed, even when all the other kids are still playing.

I’m the mom my kids call the official “Summer Ruiner” because I make them do school related worksheets and even “gasp” chores so they don’t end up watching TV all day.

I know, the horror.

I don’t want to be this way (in fact, I’d normally be the first person to stay out late and not worry about the consequences), but I know that if my oldest stays up too late, not only does he get more wound up, impulsive and likely to get in trouble, but the next few days will be super rough for everyone.

Even as I write this I can feel myself getting wound up, anxious, and the ever-present knot in my stomach getting bigger, tighter, crawling up my throat………….

Deep yoga breath, deep yoga breath.

Okay, I will stop whining.  I will stop whining.

I’m better now.  I will put on my big girl panties and remember that the challenges we face are minuscule, absolutely nothing compared to so many others. We are so lucky in so many ways.

I guess I just needed to vent a little bit.  I feel a little better.

I’ll go back to being the “Summer Ruiner” now.

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